It Turns Out . . .

Ditching the cell phone lasted 2 weeks. I was a nervous wreck every time I left kids home alone. So as of Saturday, I own a phone again, but it's by-the-minute and only people I live with have the number.

Ok, the people I live with, and whoever texted me "happy vday pickles, love dogg" on Sunday. I so wanted to text back, "dude, i ain't your pickles," but I also ain't paying per text to converse with Dogg.

My oldest turned 14 last month, which made her of age to attend her very first church youth dance, commonly know as The Stake Dance, last weekend. At the last minute, I was asked to come along (in an official capacity, as opposed to a hovering mother capacity). Turns out that even after 15 years of adulthood, I can walk into a Stake Dance and instantly feel insecure and unattractive. (It was as if the semi-gloss cinder-block wall and I had never parted.) I felt a lot better once we busted out the laptop and projector and I got to geek it up a little bit. Whew.

As for the 5K, mission accomplished! I ran most of it, fully enjoyed the lovely company, and was very grateful to have the other KB in my life (KB2?) run with me around the last couple of corners, hollering encouragement (thanks!). I was very surprised at how much I really did enjoy the whole thing (you were totally right J-Dub!), and even I can't believe I'm looking forward to the Pear Blossom 5K in April! Who knew? And who wants to come with?

Kindly do NOT click on that. I've never looked more glamorous.

Last week, I also got to be a small part of a big project that was organized on behalf of some dear friends. It was carried out by a whole bunch of people who dearly love those same friends. It was amazing to be part of it. I absolutely loved working side-by-side with awesome people for a great cause, watching each person contribute their own skills, and knowing bonds were being formed and strengthened. The prevailing mood was sweet and tender, and it seemed like everyone came away with a greater affection for each other and for the project's recipients. I'm so glad I got to participate!

'Night!

It's only Tuesday . . .

. . . in my time zone, anyway, and here's what this week has brought me:

1. I canceled my cell phone. The original plan was to wait for the contract to expire, and then use a pay-as-you-go plan for emergency calls only. I was already getting giddy about the savings. But it turns out that pay-as-you-go is a spendy little conspiracy that forces you to buy more minutes than you need. LAME. So I figured, why not see how long I can go without a cell phone?

I'm here to tell you, this is EASY.

You know, as long as I don't go anywhere.

It's leaving the house that complicates things, because first of all, I have no idea what time it is, and then I find myself thinking things like, "Hmm . . . I should call the school and tell them my cell number is no good," and then reaching for the cell phone I no longer carry. Because I'm that smart. And then I wonder how the school will ever find me if my child is mortally wounded at recess. Then I tell myself that my mom never had a cell phone and we all survived school while she ran errands, which reminds me that one of my errands involves dropping by a friend's house, except I don't know if she's home, and maybe I should call and D'OH!

It's going to be fun.

2. Remember how I got my taxes done early? Somebody tipped off my van, which promptly popped a gasket and began hemorrhaging (did you know that word has 2 h's?) transmission fluid.

Never fails.

I know, I know - be grateful the breakdowns happen when the cash is available. Here's a bit of trivia for you: Kitty litter will soak oil up off of pavement. I have ten pounds of it on my driveway right now. Luckily kitty litter only costs 1/100th of a pan gasket repair.

3. February 13th will mark six months since my dear friend KB told me it was time to suck it up and improve my health. (If you're just barely ineligible to donate a kidney and your doctor is eying your blood sugar warily and you hate shopping for clothes and you want so much to have a baby, but your body is a little wonky and you have this nagging feeling that you'd better start doing something about it all, DON'T. TELL. KB.) We've been working out in her garage pretty much every weekday since.

You know those big 3-pound tubs of margarine? KB has worked EIGHT of them off of me since August. (Humor me. It's my favorite visual.) Except one of them snuck back on, and I guess KB noticed, because she called me today and told me that she's gone and signed me up for a 5K on the 13th, along with herself and J-Dub. She also tells me I'll be doing one a month from here on out, and that I can walk as much as I please for this one, because it will be my time to improve on.

Running a 5K (or any K, or any running) was never, ever, ever on my bucket list. EVER. But I'm terribly grateful to KB for sticking with me and offering endless encouragement and not allowing excuses. I can't turn down support like that, so I'll let you know how it goes.

Oops. It's not Tuesday anymore. 'Night all!

Happy Wednesday!

I'm walkin' on sunshine, cuz the taxes are DONE DONE DONE, and it only took the last few hours of yesterday and the first half of today! Yippee!!

Had to share a couple of good ideas I've had lately. (I should write a post about all the BAD ideas, too!)

Daughter #3 (if I gave her a blog name, it would be "Pepper") is in the first grade, and really, really doesn't like practicing her spelling words. Torture for all involved. In a flash of inspiration (born of an idea sent to me by my sister long ago - can't find the link now), I poured some salt into a pan, and let her write her words in the salt.

Holy cow, if kids gave out Nobel Prizes, I'd have gotten one that evening. Who knew they'd be so enthralled?

A couple of days later, I was taxiing Pepper and some friends to our house, and I heard the following from the back seat:

"Just WAIT until you get to my house and see what my mom made!!"

(I may or may not have had a self-satisfied thought or two about the time put into homemade Christmas gifts this year, and maybe I wondered which one she was going to show off to her friends.)

And then . . . .

"It's SALT in a PAN and you can WRITE in it!!"

Ah, well. Good enough.

The following week, this idea hit:

Spelling words in dry erase marker on the counter. The kids were all a little skittish about this one . . . every one of them eying me like it was some dirty trick and I was about to start hollering and ground them all. Ouch. But after some encouragement, they busted out enough counter graffiti to put the local gangstas to shame. (95% of it erases, and the magic eraser takes care of the rest.)

And speaking of the counter, I am a big fan of having a bar in the kitchen for many, many reasons, but the kids just CAN'T resist climbing onto it. And then falling off of it. And then climbing back up. All the while, I'm begging them to STAY OFF, and I think I've developed a facial twitch every time I say it.

This idea occurred to me early on, but it seemed a little mean:

If only I had known it would train them to remain at safe elevations in a matter of a day and a half! (Set to stream, not mist.) Score one for the mother! (I have to take what I can get.)

Anybody else have some good ideas to share? (I've hit my quota now for quite some time to come.)

Word of the Year

I have a friend from college that picks a word/goal for the year instead of resolutions. I've been thinking about what I want my word to be and I have decided. Are you ready? Prepare!


My goals for the year are:

• Prepare better to serve my family meals.


• Prepare each night for an easier morning. Clean up the house at night to wake up to a clean sink and a clean floor.


• Prepare to some day move. No I'm not making an annoucement. We are NOT moving. However, we have 7 people in a 1400 square foot house. If you do the math you realize we can't live here forever. So this involves me cleaning out my closet and the garage. Getting rid of stuff so when we do someday move I will be more prepared for it.


• Prepare my van so that when I go out of town I don't have to spend forever cleaning it to prepare for our trip.


• Prepare my body to be stronger and healthier so I don't get sick as often.

Does anyone else have a good suggestion of what I can prepare? Or what their word for the year might be?

Sincerely

Dear Next-oldest Sister,

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Love, your next-youngest sister.

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Dear J-Dub,

As a general rule, I detest grocery shopping. THANK YOU for unexpectedly dropping off milk, and saving me a trip!!

Love, Your Calcium-Fortified Friend

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Dear Yonf & Mrs. H,

As an exception to the rule, impromptu late-night grocery runs with friends are delightful. Next time we'll get there in time to watch law enforcement do their thing. And I won't forget the milk. And let's call J-Dub, too.

Love, Mrs. B

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Dear Bra,

I've kept quiet about you on Facebook, not because I care much either way, but because quite frankly, you're boring. And all the clever responses have been taken.

Thanks for the support, Mrs. B ( . . . ironic)

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Dear Family,

I hereby request notice next time unexpected company arrives (particularly of the adult male variety) while I'm in the shower, preferably BEFORE I lean my towel-wrapped self out my bedroom door (which happens to be a straight shot from the living room couch) to holler at you.

Love, Grateful for the Towel

--------------------------

Dear Home-Care Supply People,

Like I said, we're done with the hospital bed. Really. Remember how it's in my living room? In place of the OTHER living room couch - not to be confused with the first couch that unexpected company sits on - that is crammed into my bedroom? (What do you mean, I usually put surplus upholstered furniture on the back porch? Who told you that?)

Seriously. Come pick it up. Or I'll turn the kids loose on it.

Love, Please?

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Dear Owner of the Large Pickup Truck with Chromed Anatomical Embellishment Hanging from your Tow Hitch,

The message we're all getting is not the message you think you're sending.

From, Eyes Averted for the Two Miles I had to Follow You.

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Dear Muscles,

If I apologize for the relentless abuse you've been subjected to this week, will you let me walk normally again? I DID give you December off, after all.

Love, Ouch

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Dear Horses,

I went to a party last month, where we all threw random topics into a hat, and then had to expound on one randomly drawn topic for 2 minutes without saying "Um", "Uh", or pausing. I drew you, horses, and although I was most definitely inclined to say, "UH, UM, PAUSE. I'm outta here," (a la Brian Regan) I took the YONF and successfully discussed you for 2 minutes.

Love, Never Seen Flicka

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Dear Person who attended the same party, called your own pager and made a hasty exit right before your own turn, then came back and got harassed into taking a turn anyway, and pulled "Nuclear Physics" from the hat,

I put that one in. Sorry.

From, I Don't Know Anything About it Either

Monthly Grocery Budget

I saw a tv show today where they were showing the way that coupons work and how you can feed your family of 4 for $50 a week. I started wondering if my budget was way off for my family. So that is where you come in. Anonymously share how much you spend every month on groceries. I will also share anonymously so I can be a part of the fun. Also put how many people are in your family so I compare. Thanks!

And a Happy New Year (of No Fear)!

"Be it Unto Me" by Liz Lemon Swindle

Well, Merry Christmas! It's a new post, for goodness' sake! (I have no idea how to properly punctuate "goodness" in that phrase. Little help, Liz? Or LCM?)

I have been busy, busy, busy, with some challenging things, but it just doesn't compare to thing happening around me, like:

Mrs. D, who ran her first sprint triathlon this fall. I went with her a year prior to cheer some friends in a sprint triathlon. Personally, I was convinced that swimming, biking, and running for hours on end would NEVER make my YONF list. But Mrs. D was inspired, and began training and preparing. A year later, she not only competed, but took FIRST in her age group AND took 20 minutes off her goal time!!

That same day, Mrs. K entered her first OLYMPIC-length triathlon, and took second in her age group!

(So thrilled for them. Still don't want to do it myself.)

Or how about Mrs. F, who has never been a runner, but trained herself over several weeks, and ran a 5K, beating her goal time, too!

I stand in awe of Mrs. S, who has endured TWO difficult surgeries this fall, and handled them both with her trademark grace and poise. The same grace and poise that she showed on Sunday while putting on her first Christmas musical program as our new choir director. She confessed that she was beyond nervous, but if you weren't there, you can take a second now to wish you had been! It was perfect!

My thoughts are constantly on KB, who is out of town for Christmas, supporting her son and his family through their little daughter's recent and sudden cancer diagnosis, with life-altering complications.

And then there's Jenn, who is also in the process of beating cancer. With a big stick, I might add. I guess cancer missed the memo to never mess with Jenn.

How lucky am I, that I get to rub shoulders with all of these people, and so many others who are just as courageous and determined?

In fact, not only do I get to rub shoulders with them, but I find myself constantly blessed by the goodness of others in so many ways!

Our blessings keep pouring in, taking the forms of meals, rides for the kids, phone calls to check on us, company of good friends, favors given exactly when they're needed, and on and on and on!

I can't begin to describe my relief when lovely, lovely Yonf called yesterday and asked if she could come over and wrap presents. I hadn't told a soul that it was the most immediately pressing thing on my mushy mind, and the greatest favor anyone could have done for me yesterday. (And boy howdy is she FAST! I blinked and it was all wrapped!)

My sister called to see what I need, and then let me dump a HUGE Christmas project on my amazing teenage nieces, who then prepared a Christmas gift so amazing that Santa himself couldn't hope to top it.

A friend showed up at my door and handed me a box of items her kids wanted to get rid of. In the box was the EXACT item that my boy has been asking for.

Honestly, I could go on!

A lot of our typical Christmas has fallen by the wayside this year. We didn't go see lights (although I made sure to ooh and aaah for the kids at anything half-way impressive on the way home from Grandma's), and I've played exactly ONE Christmas CD this month. We're squeaking the gingerbread houses in this afternoon, and I'll put our Christmas Card online sometime today, MAYBE.

But (I'll bet you saw this coming) the gratitude I feel for all the kindness that has come our way feels more like Christmas to me than anything we've neglected this month.

Have a wonderful Christmas!!