Friday, April 2, 2010

I donated it to a *local charity

After 10 minutes of navigating exasperating phone menus and holding:

Customer Service Representative: Thank you for calling Virgin Mobile. What is your Virgin Mobile number?

Me: No, I don't have one.

CSR: What?

Me: I ordered a phone from you over 7 weeks ago. The order didn't go through, and I called a few days later and canceled it, but I received a phone in the mail three days ago, and I'd like to return it to you.

CSR: So, do you need an address to send it to?

Me: Well, normally, you would give me an RMA number.

CSR: A what?

Me: Usually, in a case like this, you'll email me a UPS label with a Return Merchandise Authorization Number on it.

CSR: Do you have an account number?

Me: No, I don't have an account with you. Would you like an order number?

CSR: Yes. (repeats order number back) Please hold while I research this.

10 minutes later:

CSR: I apologize for the wait. Our system is slow. Can you continue to hold?

Me: Yes, but while I was waiting I checked with Paypal, and the payment never went through, so you were never paid for this phone.

CSR: You didn't pay for it?

Me: The payment I authorized was never completed by Virgin Mobile and has now expired.

CSR: Please hold.

10 minutes later:

CSR: Ok, you can return the phone, but because you've had it longer than 30 days, you cannot receive a refund.

Me: ?

Me: I received the phone three days ago, but I don't need a refund, because it was never paid for. I just need to know if you want it back.

CSR: It wasn't paid for?

Me: No.

CSR: How can I help you?

Me: I think it will just be easier if I keep the phone. Is that ok with you?

CSR: Um . . . yes. Can I help you with anything else?

Me: No, thank you.

*Children's Advocacy Center - I really hope this is a favor to them, and not a headache waiting to happen.


Mandi said...

HAHAHA. You are so awesome for just saying it'd be easier to keep it. I don't know if I would dare say it! What are you going to go with now?

Mrs. B said...

Man, I was so done by that point! I did consider putting it on eBay, but decided to donate it to the Children's Advocacy Center in town.

Jill said...

This conversation needs to be submitted to this hilarious site: