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Saturday, November 8, 2008

Vinyl Admonition

I woke up cranky Friday morning. (Must crack down on the 3yo who tossed and turned in my bed for 3 hours prior to dawn.) When I dragged myself out into the kitchen, my mood did not improve. I had been absent the night before,and would you like to know what to my wondering eyes did appear?
  • A container of blackberry jam covered in . . . well . . . blackberry jam.
  • Cheese, garlic, syrup, and pancake chunks in the tub of butter.
  • 8 dish cloths used to wipe up globs of who-knows-what . . . not a single one rinsed out.
  • Various remnants of all of the above caked onto the counter.
  • Two open bread bags.
  • Pancake confetti on the floor.
  • 17 dirty cups (only 6 people live here)
I'll spare you the details of my cyclically catalyzed mature and rational response. Suffice it to say the demon mother emerged, banned the entire family from the kitchen, created job security for the future therapists of America, and then slunk back to her cave to sulk.

Later in the day, I went to a local Christmas Craft Fair, and spotted this little gem:


Stupid demon mother.

10 comments:

Laura said...

If it makes you feel any better, sometimes I turn into evil demon wife. (Luckily Ben is really good at placating. . .) Sometimes I just feel like my kitchen will NEVER STAY CLEAN EVER NO MATTER HOW OFTEN I CLEAN IT.

bestgrandkidsever said...

Nice to know you're normal!

Andrea said...

The goop in the butter would have pushed me over the edge, too.

adventures in mommyland said...

You're still a rockstar! Every mother needs to have demon days to remind her kids that yes... they still need to "be afraid" even though you're the good guy. :)

marlaquin said...

From our sister the other day, concerning her baby:

sister:she's cute most of the time, but when she gets pissed off, it's like WW3.

Me:oh, she kind of reminds me of someone

sister:who is that?

me: um, most women genetically from our family. (So as not to incriminate the in-laws)

Savannah said...

Want to know my solution? I don't do dishes, or clean up the kitchen... pretty much ever. : ) I HATE DISHES! I would rather scrub the toilet with a toothbrush every day. So my loving husband takes care of that chore, all I have to do is unload the dishwasher. And the last couple of days he's even been doing that! I'm sure I'll do dishes once I'm a stay at home mom, but until then I will enjoy it!

Tana said...

I wonder what creations came out of your kitchen. I'm sure someone is feeling just a bit sick. I love the DEmon Mother. We have one at my house too.

LCM said...

Oh my gosh, with the kitchen. TD has banned the girls from being in there while we are. I decided yesterday that my sister and I will be scouring IKEA this week for kitchen and pantry organizing stuff. ID says I don't immediately clean my plate or bowl. I told him, I don't figure that I have to. I know that I will be the one cleaning it up.

Mrs. B said...

Laura - I'm trying to picture you as an evil demon wife . . . it's not working.

Mom - I was very normal this morning about 5 minutes before church started.

Andrea - It was hard to feel sympathetic when they unintentionally used the garlic-flavored butter on their pancakes this morning.

Jenn - that's what I was going for. A little healthy respect.

Marla - HOLY FREAKING COW WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???

Savannah - That's so weird - my husband has been doing the dishes for the last two days, too. I can't for the life of me figure out why?

Tana - I'm still not sure what it was, but chances are good it involved cheeze whiz.

lcm - We have that discussion here a LOT. It makes perfect sense to me, but he's still not on board.

Jerilyn said...

Fully 75% of those problems would have been cleared up with in-house dog ownership. I'm just sayin'